Usually my articles have had some references to literature of some sort. This isn’t that type of article. Here I’m just talking from me, saying anything, with the guidance of making my experiences useful for you. Or at least thought provoking and challenging. A lot of us exist and experience this world feeling unknown,… Read More Having a Career & A Love Life
Our insecurities can passively destroy our relationships or actively destroy them. Today, we’re going to explore how both work to destroy a relationship. The number one killer of relationships I’ve seen that isn’t spoken about is when our insecurities are so strong that we isolate our lovers from their friends. This is different from the… Read More Fear: Destroyer of Love
When people find out I’m a Modern Psychoanalytical Relationship Specialist the first question I’m asked is some variation of, “Why do I always fall in love with the wrong type of person?” I’ve always been so focused on understanding how to make a good relationship last a life time that I’ve neglected to explore what… Read More Attraction: Being the Lover the Lover You Want Will Want
Shelby and Roger I had a couple come in because of the lack of sex in their relationship. They both sat on the couch, Shelby sitting up strait and angry with Robert looking annoyed, sunken into the couch. “He won’t have sex with me unless I’m… Read More Absence of Sex: Lover’s Unconscious Agreement
I received many questions and comments about my last article on Izzy’s orgasm. Izzy stated that since she had her first orgasm with Rufus, she knew he was the one for her. I was told that the idea was ridiculous because orgasms come just from physical stimulation. Is that so? Reading back, I realized I… Read More Orgasms: Important Unconscious Meanings
Izzy’s Orgasm Izzy had been talking for months about her upbringing and all the residues of events in her early childhood she could see working in her current life. As if unintentionally falling out from her lips she blurted out, “I can’t believe I got married at 18.” It was curious that I had not… Read More Marriage Proposal to Orgasm. Are They the Right Lover?
Rufus & Izzy in Love Rufus was an “oops” baby he explained in one of our last couple’s session. The youngest of 13 kids, the closest sibling 15 years older than him. “I was a strange single child since all my brothers and sisters were so much older than me. I mean I have nieces… Read More How We Attach to Our Lover
Good Love starts with good unconscious attraction. How does this unconscious attraction happen? I remember a client of mine, Rufus, who found himself discovering the unconscious workings of the attraction in his relationship decades after his marriage. Throughout his analysis he learned how that unconscious attraction worked which helped him save his marriage from shattering.… Read More How Good Love Starts
I’ve found a lack of understanding cheaters with perpetuated blind notions of, “Once a cheater, always a cheater.” That quote comes from vengeance, a poison of understanding relationships & the fallen lover. Cheating is messed up, no doubt, but something to understand so healing can happen for the one who stepped out of the relationship,… Read More Loving Yourself After Cheating
You really messed up in your relationship. What do you need to know and what do you need to do? Let’s first make sure you know what’s a healthy way of resolving the mess up while understanding the traps you can fall into that’ll mess everything up even more so you can make up or… Read More You Cheated, Now What?